Phil Hellmuth as Cheater McCheaterson

Ask most people for their take on Phil Hellmuth and you, Wayward Searcher, will get various results. Most of those would include the phrases spoiled brat, world class NLHE tournament player, tantrum thrower, hunormous ego, etc. However, if Hellmuth appears on the television when my wife is in the room, the one word that she associates with his name or image is 'Cheat.' Once I think she even has gone as far to labeled him as a 'Cheater, cheater pumpkin eater.' However I may be mis-attributing that quote from one of the kids recent arguements.

(update: Phil was on 'High Stakes Poker' last night. Phil lost a big hand and started cussing. 'That's what you get, Cheater McCheaterson!' was MrsMeeks response from the kitchen)

How could MrsMeek have that almost one-of-a-kind opinion of Phil? My guess is that it is a result of a collision between a marketing ploy and Phil's ego. The story is this. We have Verizon cell phones. Not because they are a good company, but because they are the only service I could find that actually pulled a signal in my house. Verizon intentionally disables my camera phone, so that I have to pay them to download the pictures I took, either per picture or with a monthly fee. In other countries, this phone uses a cable to connect to a PC and download the pictures. But here in America, Verizon disables that feature. Anyway, we have these cell phones from an evil company, and they offer games on these phones. I'll check through for a trial game every once in a while - you know there are no free games - and happened to catch a two day trial to Texas Holdem by Phil Hellmuth. I thought I'd try it out and download it. It was a tournament style game, where you are playing at a table with Hellmuth and a few other tables. The play was going pretty standard when I get the Aces. Nice. I raise and its just Phil and I left for the flop. The flop comes A J x. Nice. Now how to get money out of a multiple WSOP bracelet holder. . . I bet, he raises, I go all in, and he calls. Hellmuth shows K8o. He would then proceed to runner runner himself a straight. I realize at that point that it is truly is Texas Holdem by Phil Hellmuth's poker game - he can not be beat. I surmise that when they were making this game, they couldn't design a software that played as well as Phil plays and fit it on the mobile phone OS. They took the best compromise they could, they rigged the game.

At that point, I stopped playing the game, and went back to the crosswords on the cell phone. My wife however, was mildly curious about poker. I showed her the game, and of course she had the same results after three tries. She'd do good against everyone else, except Phil. MrsMeek came to the same conclusion, however she harbors long term resentment because of it.

If you, Wayward Searcher, are ever watching Phil play, and he happens to go into one of his tirades, If you hear a female heckler from the crowd shout, "That's what you get, Cheater, McCheaterson!" You can be fairly certain it was my better half.